{"id":20061,"date":"2025-07-11T17:08:46","date_gmt":"2025-07-11T14:08:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/?p=20061"},"modified":"2025-07-24T23:47:45","modified_gmt":"2025-07-24T20:47:45","slug":"noriu-myleti-ne-laimeti","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/noriu-myleti-ne-laimeti\/","title":{"rendered":"NORIU MYL\u0116TI – NE LAIM\u0116TI"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Meil\u0117, kuri\u0105 sugadiname patys \u2013 net to nesuprasdami. <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Raktas \u012f s\u0117kmingus santykius \u2013 tai svarba. Galiu bandyti \u012fvairius metodus: psichologinius pratimus, film\u0173 \u012fkv\u0117ptas scenas, teorijas. Ta\u010diau visa tai \u2013 tik laikinos priemon\u0117s. I\u0161 ties\u0173 santykio kokyb\u0119 lemia tai, k\u0105 i\u0161 tikr\u0173j\u0173 jau\u010diu viduje, o ne tai, k\u0105 bandau nusl\u0117pti ar \u201esuforsuoti\u201c. Ir visos tendencijos veda mus link to, jog atpa=intume savo tikr\u0105j\u0105 prigimt\u012f ir pagaliau apsispr\u0119stume kuo norime b\u016bti.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Da\u017enai savyje pastebiu tarsi sistemin\u0119 klaid\u0105 \u2013 visuomen\u0117s \u012fdiegt\u0105 \u012fsitikinim\u0105, kad privalome b\u016bti \u201enuo\u0161ird\u016bs\u201c. Ta\u010diau kas slypi po \u0161iuo \u017eod\u017eiu? Da\u017enai tai rei\u0161kia: \u201ea\u0161 tau visk\u0105 pasakysiu, k\u0105 galvoju, o tu privalai tai priimti \u2013 geriausia, jei dar su tuo sutiksi.\u201c<\/em> Bet ar tai tikrai nuo\u0161irdumas? Grei\u010diau \u2013 spaudimas<\/em>, savoti\u0161ka manipuliacijos forma, kuri leid\u017eia pasisl\u0117pti u\u017e \u201eteisyb\u0117s\u201c kauk\u0117s.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Suprantama, jog negalime u\u017esiskl\u0119sti vieni nuo kit\u0173, bet tikras nuo\u0161irdumas savo \u017eod\u017eiais kuria, o jeigu jis griauna, \u017eemina kit\u0105 \u017emog\u0173, tai tik egoizmo pasirei\u0161kimo forma. <\/em> Mes da\u017enai \u0161eimoje naudojame posak\u012f: ,,Tavo vieno tiesa nieko neduoda m\u016bs\u0173 \u0161eimos vienybei. Svarbiausia, ne tavo vieno tiesa, o \u0161ios situacijos pasinaudojimas m\u016bs\u0173 suart\u0117jimui.” <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jau ne pirmus metus praktikuojame su artimu \u017emogumi (ar net ma\u017eiau artimu) kalb\u0117ti tik apie tai, kas stiprina ry\u0161\u012f.<\/strong>
Bendravimas turi auginti, sujungti, \u0161velninti. Jeigu tema akivaizd\u017eiai skirtinga, kelia \u012ftamp\u0105 ar prie\u0161taravimus \u2013 galb\u016bt jos nereikia liesti. Tai nerei\u0161kia melo ar i\u0161sisukin\u0117jimo \u2013 tai s\u0105moningas pasirinkimas statyti tiltus, o ne griovius, kurie veda \u012f niekur. O prie neatsakyt\u0173 klausim\u0173 gal\u0117sime gri\u0161ti tada, kai b\u016bsime emoci\u0161kai stabil\u016bs. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Toks atsitraukimas kuria tikr\u0105j\u012f meil\u0117s \u0161ok\u012f. Kai viduje pasirinkame matyti tik partnerio ger\u0105sias savybes, kai neleid\u017eiame sau \u201ekabin\u0117tis\u201c, ie\u0161koti tr\u016bkum\u0173, kai egoizmui u\u017ededame antsnuk\u012f \u2013 atsiranda erdv\u0117 meil\u0117s t\u0117kmei.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gr\u012f\u017ekime prie svarbos temos. Pavyzd\u017eiui, moteris planuoja atostogas su savo vyru. Bet prie\u0161 tai ji k\u0105 tik skund\u0117si draugei, koks jis nesupratingas, ne\u012f\u017evalgus ir u\u017esispyr\u0119s kaip ma\u017eas vaikas. Tai kaip ji dabar bendraus su vyru? Su kokia intencija? Su kokia vidine energija? Juk mes tai jau\u010diame vienas kitame. Mes net sakome: \u201ekalb\u0117jo i\u0161 auk\u0161to\u201c<\/em>. Ir taip da\u017enai mes kalbame \u2013 ne \u017eod\u017eiais, o b\u016bsena. S\u0117dime savo \u201eA\u0161\u201c karalyst\u0117je ir net nepastebime, kokia tai didel\u0117 vidin\u0117 kova \u2013 priimti kito \u017emogaus karalyst\u0119 kaip lygiavert\u0119.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gyvenimas ver\u010dia mus konkuruoti visur \u2013 net santykiuose. Net \u0161eimoje. Net su pa\u010diu artimiausiu \u017emogumi. Kas daugiau padaro, kas labiau pavargo, kas labiau nusipelno pagarbos? Mes lyginame, skai\u010diuojame, gin\u010dijam\u0117s. Ir kirtis po kir\u010dio kertame t\u0105 meil\u0117s gij\u0105 tarp m\u016bs\u0173. Nesakau, jog negali b\u016bti nesutarim\u0173. Prie\u0161ingai, jie privalo b\u016bti. Tik b\u016bdas, kaip mes juos priimame ir sprend\u017eiame da\u017enu atveju yar labai nebrandus ir ved\u0105 \u012f atitolim\u0105. \u0160iandien atrodo vienas kitas gin\u010das nieko tokio, ta\u010diau po de\u0161imties met\u0173 susikaupia toks baga\u017eas, jog norisi nuo to pab\u0117gti. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

A\u0161 tikiu, kad ne veltui gamtoje egzistuoja hierarchija, tarpusavio priklausomyb\u0117. Kiekviena gyvyb\u0117s forma turi savo funkcij\u0105 \u2013 augalas gyvena, kad maitint\u0173, daugint\u0173si, gyv\u016bnai \u2013 kad palaikyt\u0173 pusiausvyr\u0105. Tik \u017emogui duota u\u017eduotis aukl\u0117ti savo s\u0105mon\u0119<\/em>. Tapti dvasiniu maistu \u0161iam pasauliui.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ir tada santykiai \u012fgyja gyl\u012f.
Tada a\u0161 galiu pa\u017evelgti \u012f savo partner\u012f ne kaip \u012f prie\u0161inink\u0105, o kaip \u012f bendrakeleiv\u012f. Ne kaip \u012f \u201edar vien\u0105 nepaklusn\u0173 \u017emog\u0173\u201c, o kaip \u012f ypating\u0105 s\u0105junginink\u0105, su kuriuo a\u0161 ne konkuruoju, o auginu vienyb\u0119.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nesakau, kad tai lengva. Prie\u0161ingai \u2013 tai reikalauja j\u0117gos.
Kaip stiprus turi b\u016bti mano partneris,<\/em> kad gal\u0117t\u0173 atlaikyti visus mano kaprizus, nor\u0105 kontroliuoti, mano komforto siek\u012f.
Ir kaip stipri turiu b\u016bti a\u0161,<\/em> kad leis\u010diau partneriui b\u016bti laisvam \u2013 elgtis taip, kaip jam norisi, ir vis tiek i\u0161likti meil\u0117je. Nes juk tokioje laisv\u0117je \u2013 jei nebus s\u0105moningumo \u2013 peilis ki\u0161amas \u012f nugar\u0105 kas minut\u0119. O jeigu s\u0105moningumas yra \u2013 tai tampa tyliu, bet didingu meil\u0117s darbu, \u012fveikimu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ka\u017ekada, ruo\u0161iantis vesti \u0161eim\u0173 kursus, viena lektor\u0117 pasak\u0117: ,,Niekada gyvenime nekalb\u0117kite draug\u0117ms ar kam nors kitam blogai apie savo partner\u012f \u2013 niekada! Nes patys imsite tik\u0117ti, koks jis nevyk\u0119s, kvailas, nevertas j\u016bs\u0173. O dar ir draug\u0117s pasir\u016bpins, kad taip manytum\u0117te. Jeigu a\u0161 ie\u0161kosiu, kuo \u017eav\u0117tis savo partneryje, kuo \u012fkv\u0117pti save, kuo did\u017eiuotis \u2013 jis mano akyse bus tobuliausias vyras.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O jei vyras matys savo \u017emon\u0105 kaip patraukli\u0105, gyv\u0105, \u017eaisming\u0105 \u2013 ji jam taps lyg supermodelis, jo paties karalien\u0117. Ir kiekvienas sugr\u012f\u017eimas namo bus ne kan\u010dia, o palaima.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Taip viskas ir veikia. Paprastai, bet nepaprastai.
Did\u017ei\u0105j\u0105 dal\u012f santyki\u0173 problem\u0173 sukuriame mes patys \u2013 skub\u0117dami, ne\u012fvertindami, pamir\u0161dami, d\u0117l ko apskritai esame kartu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

O gal kartais pakanka tiesiog sustoti ir paklausti sav\u0119s:
\u201eKokios savyb\u0117s mano partneryje mane \u017eav\u0117jo i\u0161 prad\u017ei\u0173? Ar jos vis dar gyvos mano \u017evilgsnyje?\u201c<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Juk tai, k\u0105 pasirenkame matyti \u2013 t\u0105 ir auginame.
Jeigu m\u016bs\u0173 santykis, m\u016bs\u0173 meil\u0117 man bus i\u0161 tikr\u0173j\u0173 svarbi<\/em>, a\u0161 niekada jos neskaudinsiu. A\u0161 r\u016bpinsiuosi ja, j\u0105 puosel\u0117siu. Ir tada net pasiaukojimas nebebus sunkus \u2013 jis taps savaime suprantamu meil\u0117s veiksmu.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Toks ry\u0161ys nebeturi \u201ekainos\u201c. Jis dovanoja jausm\u0105, kurio taip tr\u016bksta \u0161iandienos pasaulyje \u2013 tikr\u0105 vidin\u0119 pilnatv\u0119<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P.S. Sud\u0117tingiausia s\u0105lyga – \u0161iame \u017eaidime turi dalyvauti abu. Bet galb\u016bt, jeigu a\u0161 pabandysiu \u017eengti pirma, partneris atsakys tuo pa\u010diu? Nebijokime manipuliacijos, nes i\u0161kart pajausime ar tai tikra ar ne. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Meil\u0117, kuri\u0105 sugadiname patys \u2013 net to nesuprasdami. Raktas \u012f s\u0117kmingus santykius \u2013 tai svarba. Galiu bandyti \u012fvairius metodus: psichologinius pratimus, film\u0173 \u012fkv\u0117ptas scenas, teorijas. Ta\u010diau visa tai \u2013 tik laikinos priemon\u0117s. I\u0161 ties\u0173 santykio kokyb\u0119 lemia tai, k\u0105 i\u0161 tikr\u0173j\u0173 jau\u010diu viduje, o ne tai, k\u0105 bandau nusl\u0117pti ar \u201esuforsuoti\u201c. Ir visos tendencijos veda […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":20147,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_uag_custom_page_level_css":"","site-sidebar-layout":"default","site-content-layout":"","ast-site-content-layout":"default","site-content-style":"default","site-sidebar-style":"default","ast-global-header-display":"","ast-banner-title-visibility":"","ast-main-header-display":"","ast-hfb-above-header-display":"","ast-hfb-below-header-display":"","ast-hfb-mobile-header-display":"","site-post-title":"","ast-breadcrumbs-content":"","ast-featured-img":"","footer-sml-layout":"","ast-disable-related-posts":"","theme-transparent-header-meta":"","adv-header-id-meta":"","stick-header-meta":"","header-above-stick-meta":"","header-main-stick-meta":"","header-below-stick-meta":"","astra-migrate-meta-layouts":"set","ast-page-background-enabled":"default","ast-page-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-4)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"ast-content-background-meta":{"desktop":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"tablet":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""},"mobile":{"background-color":"var(--ast-global-color-5)","background-image":"","background-repeat":"repeat","background-position":"center center","background-size":"auto","background-attachment":"scroll","background-type":"","background-media":"","overlay-type":"","overlay-color":"","overlay-opacity":"","overlay-gradient":""}},"footnotes":""},"categories":[44],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20061","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-vyrai-moterys-santuoka-straipsniai"],"uagb_featured_image_src":{"full":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false],"thumbnail":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false],"medium":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false],"medium_large":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false],"large":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false],"1536x1536":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false],"2048x2048":["https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/07\/136aedc8-2e0a-4a37-9804-e65d41ee9007.jpg",614,307,false]},"uagb_author_info":{"display_name":"iMami","author_link":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/author\/roberta-rumbutienegmail-com\/"},"uagb_comment_info":0,"uagb_excerpt":"Meil\u0117, kuri\u0105 sugadiname patys \u2013 net to nesuprasdami. Raktas \u012f s\u0117kmingus santykius \u2013 tai svarba. Galiu bandyti \u012fvairius metodus: psichologinius pratimus, film\u0173 \u012fkv\u0117ptas scenas, teorijas. Ta\u010diau visa tai \u2013 tik laikinos priemon\u0117s. I\u0161 ties\u0173 santykio kokyb\u0119 lemia tai, k\u0105 i\u0161 tikr\u0173j\u0173 jau\u010diu viduje, o ne tai, k\u0105 bandau nusl\u0117pti ar \u201esuforsuoti\u201c. Ir visos tendencijos veda…","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20061","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20061"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20061\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":20065,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20061\/revisions\/20065"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/20147"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20061"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20061"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/ugdymasirauklejimas.lt\/home\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20061"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}